Joys of Womanhood V - "Take Charge of your Fertility" (And why you should care) [EN]

 In the SIM course we were were recommended the following book: Take charge of your Fertility.

While reading it - Which I highly recommend - I realized how much I have learned about myself and how much better that makes me feel. This knowledge makes me feel in control, in charge of my body and all its possibilities.

This is NOT JUST a book for the woman who wants to get pregnant. It's for any woman who wants knowledge and control over her body.

There is a lot of information about hormonal conditions, like anovulatory cycles, irregular cycles,  POCS, hypothyroidism, endometriosis, and ovarian cysts.

Also, this book focuses on the Fertility Awareness Method (FAM). If you are curious about this, read below what it is about and why it can (or not) be a good alternative for you.

This post is not only a summary of what I learned in the book, but also some of my experiences with it and personal opinions. Remember - Knowledge is power. Never feel like you're wasting time when you're reading and learning, especially about yourself.

Why and how to read this book even if you're not looking to getting pregnant

First of all, fertility is the highest indicator of health. So if you want to know if you're doing everything right for your body or if there are things you should maybe change, keeping your cycles, your hormones and your fertility in check is a great way of doing so. 

Also, feeling more in tune with yourself and your body can give you a peace of mind you didn't even know you needed. After stopping with the pill, I started feeling when my body was ovulating and also when PMS was coming. Being aware of when I was more fertile helped me in preventing unwanted pregnancies every month. I really feel like I am in control of my body.

A (possible) roadmap for this book, depending on why you are reading it:

• FAM Basics for every woman: Ch 1-6, 10-12, 18-21, 23
• Trying to get pregnant - First 4-6 months: Ch. 1-6, 10, 13, 14
• Fertility issues while getting pregnant (after 6 months TTC): 1-6, 15, 16, 17,  19
• Young women / Adolescents: 1-6, 9-12, 18, 20, 21, 23
• Menopausal women: 22, 23
• Women with specific hormonal issues: 7-10, 19
• Professionals/Practitioners looking to support women: All the book

Some common myths

Common myth: Our cycle has an average duration of 28 days.

A healthy cycle can vary between 21-35 days. This means that the assumption that ovulation occurs on day 14 is also wrong. That will depend on your cycle duration and other factors. You can ovulate on day 8 some months and day 20 in other months. This will radically change your fertility days (Also, f you're trying not to get pregnant, then you should be careful

Common myth: Fertility Awareness Method (Or Natural Planning Method) is counting the days on the calendar to control your fertile, non fertile and ovulation days. It's a total hoax.

This method involves not only day counting but also taking basal temperature and observing the cervical mucus and, in more extreme cases, your uterus position throughout your cycle. 

However, FAM as a method of contraception should be used only for monogamous couples with maturity and discipline to follow the method accordingly.

Common myth: I don't need to worry about my fertility until I want to get pregnant. Then all I'll have to do is stop taking the pill.

When using the FAM method, we can identify/diagnose a number of conditions, including: Anovulation / Lack of ovulation; Late ovulation; Short luteal phases; Infertile cervical fluid; Hormonal cervical fluid; Hormonal imbalances; Insufficient progesterone levels; Occurrences of miscarriages; And mostly, the three most prevalent conditions all women should be aware of: Ovarian cysts, Endometriosis, and PCOS.

Important steps before or in the beginning of your Fertility, or TTC journey (Trying to Conceive - Apparently, this is a thing)

1- Start with your 3-months reset (For both you and your partner). You can check this book for reference: The Fertility Diet, developed by Harvard researchers. As a synopsis:

• Avoid trans fats;
• Use more unsaturated vegetable oils;
• Increase vegetable protein;
• Choose slowly digested carbs;
• Get iron from plants;
• Drink a lot of water to stay hydrated, skip sugary sodas;
• Take a multivitamin (at least 400mcg/day of folic acid)
• Achieve ideal body fat ratio - 20-24 BMI
• Exercise;
• Reduce your stress;
• Sleep;
• Avoid hormone disruptors;
• Deal with thyroid disorders.

2- Make sure to start measuring and registering your basal temperature (any basal thermometer you buy online will do, should have two decimal cases and if possible should record your last temperature so you can record it somewhere during the day

Why should I measure my temperature?

• You can see whether you ovulated or not by the rise of the temperature;
• You can see if the second phase of the cycle is long enough to get pregnant; (at least 10 days)
• See if I have conceived in a cycle. (18 consecutive high temps after ovulation)
• See if you had a miscarriage, which some women easily mistake for a late period.
• You can see when you can have wonderful unprotected sex without worrying for a baby, usually on the second half of your cycle.

How to measure my temperature?

• Take your temp first thing upon awakening, before getting up or even checking your phone.
• Try to measure it always at the same time - give or take maximum one hour.
• Take your temp orally or vaginally. Regardless, always use the same method. If using orally, put your thermometer under your tongue and make sure to close your mouth shut.
• Record possible aberrations (illnesses, alcohol, drugs, travelling) so that they can explain differences in temperature.

3- Start observing your cervical mucus

Mucus, right? What a word! It's really less complicate than it seems. 

• Fertile mucus: Wet-quality, egg-white, lubricative vaginal sensation, sometimes creamy if you never have the egg-white mucus.

How to check which one? Start checking the day after your period. 

You can check every time you go to the bathroom, either by using kegels/vaginal contractions and then passing the toilet paper and observe it, just be aware not to mix sexual lubrification and cervical mucus - These are not the same. 

You can also lift your secretion off the toilet paper/tissue to feel it with your thumb and middle finger, checking for sticky, creamy or slippery sensation. You can also check your underwear if you are using dark colored one.

(Note: For me, I couldn't really distinguish between sticky or creamy or eggwhite, so I started thinking maybe I didn't have a fertile cervical mucus. If you have the same fear and want to give your cervical mucus a little help while trying to conceive, avoid using normal lubricants and even your saliva, since they can kill sperm. Use fertility-focused lubricants, for example, here, or the Pre-Seed ones if you can find them. These can make all the difference for you.)

4- You can also check your cervical position

This is the most challenging fertility sign and usually only women which have already been charting their cycles for some time are able to tell the difference. If you are interesting in understanding, this you can take a look at the book or some good articles about the subject. I haven't felt the need to check this yet but it can be useful if the other signs are not clear.

 

5- Start understanding and feeling your secondary fertility signs

These are called secondary because they don't necessarily occur in all women or even in every cycle. However, they can still be useful to identify fertile and infertile phases.

• Ovulatory spotting;
• Pain/achiness near the ovaries;
• fuller vaginal lips or swollen vulva;
• Abdominal bloating; 
• Increased sexual feelings;
• Increased energy level;
• Increased sensitivity in breasts and skin;
• Breast tenderness

Which tech tools can help me out ?

Nowadays there are so many apps which can help you out! I personally love Flo since it can help you during any different phases, making you understand your symptoms, give you information about each day of your cycle, and even accompanying you through your journey when you are trying to conceive and then pregnancy's. It's a really complete app (specially on premium mode) and you can use it to input your temperature, your cervical mucus, and even test results. 

Clue is also quite good, although without some of the features that Flo has.

Of course, you can choose any app that helps you out, but beware: These apps are mostly man funded and man-owned and they will most probably be collecting and selling your data to companies to profit from them.

I am still looking for a company which is reliable and in particular, woman founded. 

So if any of this bothers you, you can always chart your basal temperature and other daily signs on paper. Or, if you are tech-savy, build your own app!

What about the male fertility?

It is quite common to put all the pressure on the woman's side, but the truth is, after 6 months trying to have a baby using the methods described above, you should check your partner's sperm count to see if there are any issues on his side. Some couples wait one or 2 years before realizing that the issue was the men's and woman had been torturing herself for all this time trying to figure out what was wrong with her.

Also, while trying to improve their fertility, men should avoid:

• Hot tubs, saunas;
• Bicycling;
• Tight clothing;
• Supplements;
• Stress;
• Generally being overweight.

Thanks for reading and have a great week ahead!

This article is meant to gather quite the extensive knowledge of the SIM course into a digestible way so that I can maybe provide some insight and knowledge to friends and curious women. Even though I have made some research and additional readings to write these articles, I credit it all to our amazing teachers in the course and of course the writer of the "Take Charge of Your Fertility". They are the true women warriors. I’m just passing the word along.

The course is coordinated by Antonella Vignati, an amazing teacher and professional. I recommend her if you are looking for a trained professional in any health issues related to fertility, cycles, or even generic health - If you are ready to make some significant life changes.

I also really recommend this course and this book to any woman, at any age — As women I believe we deserve to have all the information available to us, so that we can make the right choices for us, and for our body.